I've let it too late (in my life and in my day) to really think this through but it just struck me the one thing I heard and the one thing I read today:
- compression (from Merlin Man)
- flaking (from Fox Woods)
are connected.
Time gets compressed to the smallest possible amount to get whatever needs doing done - and no smaller. Having to get stuff done when something is compressed to its smallest time - not allowing time before the commitment to prepare and after to debrief (let's call it 'travel time') - causes stress and anxiety. This situation often happens when we over-commit ourselves - and there are a raft of reasons we do that.
There are also times when we flake. When we just don't show up to somewhere or do something we promised we'd do - and don't even offer an explanation (so rude <= judgement right there).
Do we flake because we've compressed our time to such an extent through over commitment that stuff just has to go - toss it out! throw it overboard! only keep the essentials!
- If someone continuously flakes on you, you are one of their non-essentials - an expendable asset.
- If you find yourself a repeat offender when it comes to not making good on your promises - you may be a thoughtless jerk OR you have a habit of overcommitting yourself.
I'm an occasional flaker, but I am a chronic over-committmenter (cross pollinated with extreme laziness - deadly combo). My current landscape is littered with the collatoral damage of that particular affliction.
Fear not, gentle reader, there is help at hand - or at least I smell it around the corner.
..but right now I sleeps.
(note to self about empathy, and drawing the line, and exhaling)