I was wondering if the woman in front of me in the checkout queue was preparing for a job interview.
She was purchasing black trousers, a black jacket and a pair of black shoes. She also had a small pink packet. At first I thought it was a pair of knee-highs but on closer subtle inspection I discovered something I'd never known before.
Have you ever heard of "Liftits" before? And if you have, and you have boobs, have you ever tried them? and if you have, do you get the same unnatural shape to your silhouette that this video suggests?
Current host Conor Knighton looks at television's love affair with Apple products from the iPad to the iPhone to the iMac. From the iTools on "The Insider" to the casts of favorite comedies like 30 Rock and Entourage, everyone is drinking the Apple-flavored Kool-Aid.
Grumpy Bastard's Trivia, every Wednesday 7:30pm at Grumpy's Green - hosted by Richard McKenzie (or Cameron McKenzie when Richard's off being funny for other people)
Our team is pants. In name and nature. What we lack in knowledge, we make up for in enthusiasm - and beer, cider and nacho consumption.
For the two weeks preceding last night's match, our team had come dead last. We try really hard but alas, we don't get very far. This isn't as bad as it seems as it means we get a $10 bar voucher for coming last - and because Richard has been kindly, and Cameron didn't know any better, we haven't been given some demeaning task to get that voucher. WIN!
So on Wednesday night we arrived with hope in our hearts - hope for a hat trick. The bar staff were keen to see us lose again - the winds of fortune seemed to be riding in our favour until...
How GBT works
There are four rounds of 10 questions each - at the end of a round, each team swaps their answer-sheet with another team to mark. And it was at this point, at the end of Round One, when we swapped our answer-sheet with the Three-legged Cat (TLC) team, that the wind of hope left our boat of dreams in the dolldrums - they were worse than us!
Richard reads the rules - they're simple and the same every week:
Don't cheat!
Spelling doesn't matter.
What is on Richard's sheet is the correct answer.
Mark as you would be marked. (This rule usually surfaces when too many people question what might pass as a correct answer and Richard gets sick of making that call)
Listen to Richard McKenzie share the rules of GBTrivia -
We never really stood a chance of losing with TLC in the room - their wrong answers were frequent and terrible:
Q: Who recently missed out on the record of being the youngest person to circumnavigate the globe? TLC: Jessica Boat Girl.
Q: What do the letters CMYK stand for? TLC: Cyan, Magenta, Yellow and Kolor.
Q: What is the name of Mickey Rouke's character in Iron Man 2? TLC: The Dark Lord.
We played our usual game - getting some, missing some, guessing from the picture sheet during Round Four - and came third last. Which is useless because you don't get beer for third-last!
Your stupid pants
Here are a few of the questions we missed on Wednesday - can you answer them? - leave your attempts in the comments.
How many miles do you have to sail to count as having sailed 'around the world'?
What is the square root of 289?
What is the number DCLXVI?
In Rugby Union, what does the No.5 play?
Which Shakespearian play has Valentine and Proteus as their central characters?
What type of book is a Grimoire?
What phrase did the French cry as they killed their badly wounded enemies and animals?
See how you do and, if you know the answers to those questions, why don't you consider coming along and helping out* our team: Pants.
* not helping us OUT of our pants - we can do that 100% correctly.
