The Jamjar

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Sleepszzzzzz

I am consumed by thoughts of sleep. At this very moment every cell in my body is bone tired. I have slept all night and woken up exhausted. Now that, my dear friends, is a problem. It’s also inefficient, and if “feeling rested” was a key performance indicator for sleep, it would be getting a solid “did not meet expectations” from me.

This is in part connected with my low iron and an example of how I can’t feel any change for taking iron supplements. I can’t wait to get my blood tested again to see if the numbers tell a different story. The other part of the story is that I’ve been trying to change my sleep pattern to become an early riser. It started off great, but rapidly descended into the crazy pants I find myself wearing now.

I want to rise at 5am every day (calm down, it’s possible).

Mornings are an amazing time, especially for rabbit-watching, but that’s by the by. I have found that early mornings are a time that is my own - and I’m speaking from experience because my early rising experiment had some successes in the beginning - to do with as I please. I have the house to myself; words to type on a keyboard; quiet time where nothing needs doing; where no one talks to me; no one needs answering. Plus the day just stretches out and there’s so much time get things done. Hunger kicks in at ‘normal’ times and generally, days that start earlier are better.

But damned if early mornings not the most exclusive clubs for night owls to get in to.

Sure, they say, get up early, they tweet. Those larks and their songs about all the successful kids are doing it before breakfast and 21 days to create a habit and changing your life and getting things done and oh wait, actually, 40 days to a habit and you don’t do yoga? well you can still get up and do something, I suppose.

Okay that’s my tired talking. I’m tired. I’m waking up in time to get up in time to be a morning person but I’m exhausted. I am a walking zombie. On Saturday morning and I got up early because I had to do some work. Yes I know they promised the new Content Management System would be able to schedule content to go live so I wouldn’t have to do this anymore but you know how the best project promises go after the software is launched. So I had to get up early on a Saturday and publish content manually which isn’t the hardship I’m making it out to be because I actually love publishing content to the internet as much as I love feeding my rabbits.

And I got up for a while to do my work but then I lay down because The Tired.

It’s not even a sleepy tired it’s a “Oh god aren’t we there yet” tired; a “I can’t even lift my arms to spoon breakfast into my mouth” tired. I suspect is tied to the low iron count. And so I slept, for another three hours, and woke up exhausted.

(this post doesn’t have an ending - but it does have sequels)