The Jamjar

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Parlez-vaus francias?

Snug, I see that you have a stack of lever-arch files under you desk.
          Yes, yes I do.
You'll have to move those into a cupboard.
          Why? I use those folders like, once a month. I like them there.
Well you'll have to move them. They're an OSH hazard.
          An OSH hazard you say?
Yes, you could trip over them if there was a fire.
          I'd trip over the folders that are UNDER my desk?
Yes.
          No.
No what?
          No I would not trip over the folders that are so far under my desk I can just touch them if I stretch out.
Well they're also a health hazard 'cos you can't move your legs freely under your desk.
          ......?
Don't look at me like that!
          I like my folders there. I'm not going to walk half way around the office just to get my stuff.
The health nurse will insist.
          I like it when they do that.
Do what?
          Insist. I always say no. Then they say I've been a naughty boy. And then....well, you get the idea.
What? Just move them.
          I'll move them to the eastern battlement....will that make you happy?
Sure. Ummm....you'll move them where?
          To the eastern battlement. You see, at the moment, the offending folders make up the southern wall of my castle. They're not structural or anything but they do a great job at slowing the French down whilst I slaughter them like dogs with my archers.
What?
          I know! They keep trying to storm the keep from the south. If they only glanced at the heavily wooded area off to the east they'd realise it would supply a measure of cover from my archers as they approach the walls. It's actually quite a blind spot for me...that's why I'd like to reinforce it with those folders.
Are we still talking about those folders?
          Hello? Eastern battlement....Frenchmen getting slaughtered like dogs....we were JUST talking about them.
So....you're going to move them then?
          Yes, yes I will.
OK.
          *smiles*
Soooo....do you mean you have a fort under your desk?
          I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of said fort. Parlez-vaus francias?
You're a bit wierd aren't you?
          You look a bit French......who do you work for!?
*backs away slowly*